Your Groom Wedding Speech Tips

You will not only experience giving your own groom wedding speech, but also listening to your bride wedding speech as well? Consider yourself lucky. It does not happen often that the bride decides to give one herself too. Now you should consider the bride and groom speeches together. How to do that in a proper way?

Work together!

Talk to her about what she wants to say. Maybe both of you have similar thoughts. It is not a good idea to bore your guests with wedding speeches that are mostly about the same topics. Do not worry, if you realize that your bride and groom speeches are overlapping in too many points. Split up about half of the topics. Why not splitting up all? It would seem odd, if there would be nothing in your wedding speeches that you have in common.

Improve the bride and groom wedding speeches.

An even better idea is to build up the speeches on each other. When she gives her after your groom wedding speech, she can use what you said and make annotations and statements based on that. It is also a great way to make jokes. But both of you should keep in mind not to embarrass each other. On that day jokes in your groom wedding speech and her bride speech should reflect the love and respect you have for each other. Anyway as you can see there is a great potential if your future wife decides to give a speech herself!

Do not spoil everything.

If you want to surprise your bride with a few things, you do not have to share every detail about your groom wedding speech, not reveal every joke you came up with so far. I am sure your bride does not want to share every detail either. Just share the main ideas you both have and decide on what parts you like to work together in more detail. I am sure your groom wedding speech and her bride speech will be even more successful if you decide to work as a team.

You finished your first version of your groom toast and speech. You have a good feeling, but there are a few things you are still unsure about. So what to do next? One possibility is to just continue to work on your speech and make revisions. The problem is you have no idea really if any change is useful to improve your speech. You could give your speech to a friend and get feedback that will hopefully help you to improve your speech. And then start the whole process all over again.

But do not worry, there is another even better way!

Have a speech test run. Invite one or two friends. Consider to invite the best friend of your bride as well. A close friend of her could provide valuable feedback! You could also consider inviting someone of her parents. There are different opinions about if it is a good idea to invite your bride as well. Since the whole groom speech is about you and her it sounds like a good idea. But people do not want to spoil everything and keep a few surprises. I  think there is no right or wrong. Trust your instincts on that. I did invite my wife to the speech test run and she enjoyed it.

For a successful speech test run it is important to set a few ground rules. Let everyone know the purpose of the speech test run. Tell them to not interrupt the groom speech and not give feedback every time they feel the need to. Ask them to let you finish it and then discuss the groom wedding toast and speech all together. If your bride will be present too, place her next to you and the rest of the audience in front of you. By doing so you can practice the speech itself but also your interaction with the audience as I mention in another post.

It is time to begin! Start with your groom toast. When you greet someone turn to them as they would be there. Continue with your groom speech. Pay attention to the reactions especially when you use passages that are meant to be funny. If you notice any reaction you do not understand make a mental note. The best way to get feedback is to ask actively questions. So try not to be shy later. During the discussion make notes! Write everything down even if you do not agree right away. It might give you useful insights later when you go over it again!

So the speech test run is over and you got valuable information. What now? First thing you will do is putting everything away at least for two days. Give yourself time to relax. Try not to think about your speech. Do something else. Put your mind at ease. That is important to be able looking at everything from a different angle later. Then grab your groom wedding speech and the feedback and go through it. Make adjustments. If you are not convinced of something, do NOT change it. Never forget it is your groom speech and it should reflect your character and no one else.

Earlier I talked about people you should not forget. Now let us talk about things you should include into your groom wedding speech. As mentioned before this is all about you and your bride. Concentrate on that! Talk about memorable things. Tell them in your wedding speech what made you fall in love with her and later showed you that you want to spend the rest of your life with her. Let me give you a few examples of what you could use:

• The moment you met her for the first time.
• Little things about her you love so much.
• The day when you propose to her.
• Lessons you learned due to the relationship and directly by her. (opportunity to create funny groom speech moments!)

These are only a few examples of topics you can use. Let us talk about how to do it. First you can and should use jokes. Try to be funny! It is a day of joy and happiness, so there is no reason to bother the people with a 100% serious wedding speech. Build in jokes to create a real great and funny groom wedding speech. But do NOT overdo it! And even more important choose jokes wisely. You do not want to embarrass or offend anyone especially not your bride.

Interact with your bride and the audience while giving the wedding speech. Switch between them. Address them directly. It is not a good thing to give your beloved one the feeling she would not be in the same room while you are talking about her. You would regret it later. Look her into the eyes. Hold her hand in the right moment. There are many ways to interact with people while giving your groom speech, for example when you talk about the day you met her the first time, you could start by describing the situation looking and addressing the audience. When you reach the point of your first encounter in your wedding speech turn to your bride and talk directly to her. Describe what you felt when you saw her and heard her voice. Turn back to the audience again getting to the point that you knew that she was the right one.

If you construct your groom wedding speech that way it will feel more like an active conversation to the people instead of just passive listening from their end. That way they will enjoy it more and remember it longer. But always keep one thing in mind: Be genuine! Do not use words or phrases you would not use normally.

I found a nice groom wedding speech example. It is not perfect, but includes many great parts. Even the funny moments seem to work very well and i could not find anything that embarrassed someone else, at least not too much. Check it out. I like that video especially because it is a good example for a not perfect speech that is warm hearted and goes very well.

Please note: This is only part one of two! Make sure to check out the second part two.

So you started to gather material for your wedding speech. Of course it is impossible to put everything into that groom speech. Your speech could risk to bore people to death. And we do not want that right? But there are things you want to consider putting into your wedding speech. For now let us talk about the people that should be included:

• Your bride

She and you are the reasons for everyone being there. I do not have to remind you that the main focus of the whole groom wedding speech should be your wife and the reason you felt in love with her and why you want to spend the rest of your life with her. We will talk about that later on in more detail.

• Your bride parents

I witnessed a few wedding speeches were the brides parents were not mentioned as much as they were supposed to be. It caused bad feelings and that is something you want to avoid. Even if you do not have the best relationship to them be nice. Thank them! They were the people who raised the woman you felt in love with. That alone should be reason to be grateful. Find adequate words to thank them, furthermore show gratitude for being accepted and welcomed into their family.

• Your parents

You should thank your parents for raising you and by that enabling you to find and love the right woman. I know that a few of you might have problems finding the proper words to show your parents how grateful you are. A little advice: I had the same issue and I just asked my wife. She was able to help me formulating the right words and my question put her mind at ease, because she saw how much I was working on my groom wedding speech.

• Best Man and Maid of Honor

They both played a vital role in the whole ceremony. But furthermore they played an important part in your relationship as well. Mention them! Thank them! In a way by being the Best Man and Maid of Honor they both agree to your marriage and give it their blessings. That is something worth mentioning in your wedding speech.

• Other important people

Are there other people who are important to be mentioned? Let me give you an example: If you were introduced to your bride by someone and that person is there, you know what to do. Talk about that moment and thank the person.

• Everyone else

Since we cannot mention everybody by name, just say thanks to everyone in your groom wedding toast for being there. You can also give the people the impression that you have regrets that you cannot mention everyone you are grateful to, but there is just not enough time.

Of course that is not the order you should use to build up your groom wedding speech, in fact since your wife is the most important part of your wedding speech you should talk about her at the end. When you look around on the internet you will hear several different opinions about whom to mention in what order. Honestly I think there is no right answer to it. My suggestion is that you start by thanking everybody to be there, then address your parents, your brides parents, the Best Man and Maid of Honor, then maybe someone who is worth mentioning and the best in the end, your bride.

Having brainstorming sessions as I mentioned early is great and will help you to gather all the information you want to use in your groom wedding speech. But we should not kid ourselves here. Your mind will be occupied with your groom speech and groom toast almost all the time. And it will happen more than once that you have an idea at times and places you are not prepared for. Especially of that I bought a small old fashioned notebook and a pen and always carried it around. If you do not want to buy a small notebook just for that a simple piece of paper will do the trick as well.

Do it! It will come in handy!

I had so many great ideas not only in the office at work, but also in the supermarket even sometimes in a restroom and was always happy that I was able to write it down right away to further improve my groom speech.

You will not regret keeping something to write down with you all the time.

In my first post I gave you the possibly most important advice: Start early! Now let us talk about how to get it done without going insane. You need material to fill your wedding speech with. It might sound like overkill planning for something like a simple groom speech. Believe me when I tell you, a speech is never as simple as it seems to be. With every day of your ongoing efforts to work on your groom speech you will gather more material that will either raise questions or you want to use in your wedding speech. After a couple of weeks more likely days, you will have so much material at your hand that it will be difficult to keep track of everything. But how to get all the information being used in a groom wedding speech?

Brainstorming sessions.

Find a time and place where no one is bothering you. Turn of the cell phone. Avoid any distractions. Find a relaxing position either if it is lying down, sitting or even wandering around in your room. Whatever suits you best to let your thoughts flow around your groom speech will do. If you are not familiar with the whole concept of brainstorming: It is about gathering information. The quality does NOT matter. Only the quantity is important. If you have an idea for your groom speech (a funny wedding speech joke for example), write it down. If you second thoughts about the idea. Do NOT act on it! Keep it! Even if you do not use it later, maybe it will trigger another, maybe even better idea!

So always keep in mind: Write everything down!

I asked myself if I should do it alone or seek help of friends or even my wife. I suggest you do all of it. Brainstorm on your own, but also do it with a close friend even with your best man (he has to work on his best man speech and could appreciate the additional input) and later your wife. What you should avoid is a meeting with a friend AND your wife. It will only lead to confusion and more headaches. Here is what I did:

• First speech Brainstorming alone
• Waiting a couple of days.
• Second speech Brainstorming with best man
• Waiting a couple of days
• Third speech Brainstorming with my bride
• Waiting a few more days
• Speech Brainstorming alone again

Why the breaks among the sessions you might ask? The reason is simple but powerful: It helps a lot to check the material later and  to look at everything from a different perspective. One last advice on brainstorming: Do not fall for the thought you have to use anything your friends or especially your wife are mentioning. You DO NOT have to do that! In the end it is your groom wedding speech and it should reflect you and your personality.

I know what you think. The big day is still far away, so there is enough time to write your wedding speech right? Somehow you will manage and a couple of days are more than enough. So why starting to work on it early?

I had the same thoughts, did not worry about it. I knew I had to do it. I knew that Alaria expected me to put some effort into it, but I was sure that most people put too much into it and make their life miserable just because of a tiny little wedding speech most people would have forgotten weeks later anyway. Boy was I wrong! As I mentioned in my introduction the moment when Alaria approached me and asked about my progress I did not only realize how important it was to her, but how much time it would take to write a speech that would be appropriate. So here is my first and possibly most important advice for you:

Start early with your groom wedding speech! Plan ahead!

I went through a lot of trouble and headaches because of me delaying and even more important not taking it serious enough. The night my wife approached me, I sat down almost right away to start writing down my groom speech. So there I was sitting in front of my computer no idea how to do it. What would be a good beginning? What should be the main part? How should I end the groom speech? Are jokes allowed in a groom wedding speech and what kind of jokes I better should avoid? What people I have to mention in my groom speech?

With every minute I was sitting in front of my computer more questions popped into my mind and I realized that my groom speech would be much more work than i expected before. The thought of the coming weeks of me working on this groom wedding speech was nerve wrecking.